Blog 86: Truly Tragic

Imagine a place where there is no internet; no reception. Buildings are no higher than 2 stories, if that, and they certainly don't fully protect the inhabitants from the cruel weather outside. Imagine having to cook using whatever heat is left from the bath the other 10 people had earlier. Imagine living in the cold and damp, perhaps in a cottage, but more likely, in a tent. Imagine having to live somewhere where there are few toilets, perhaps just one toilet, and imagine it breaking and having to go Boom Boom in a field, in the rain, with the sheep.

Worst of all, imagine a place like this existing in the 21st Century.

Well, believe it or not, there IS a place like this. And it's only like 5 hours up the M6.

We call it the Lake District, but perhaps a more accurate name is HELL.

Yes. I had no reception. I had no internet (FOR TWO WEEKS). I was in a cottage for one week and a tent the next. (Do you know what's worse than living in a tent? NOTHING.) There were 10 others, not much hot water (or any water that didn't have sheep's wee in) and it took ages to cook. The toilet was BROKE and I did have to attempt in a field, in the rain, with the sheep, and I gave up and then me and three friends arranged a trip to the river and to share the flush.

Which worked, before you judge.

So yeah, pretty hellish. Then add to that the fact your getting about 5 hours sleep a night, and it's in a TENT so it's not even good sleep...not exactly a trip to Greece.

There was one beautiful plus, and that's the new craze some of us are starting, and I'll name them here, those glorious pioneers: Mark, Tim, Eric, Simon, Trev and myself. We were the pioneers of the new golden age of Lake District Film Music Driving Craze. But you can join in too.

Go to the Lake District.

Go driving through it.

Play classic film music full blast as you go.

Of course, this works best if you have John Williams music, but we found James Bond, Mission Impossible and Gladiator work incredibly well. We also suspect that Pirates of the Caribbean, Lord of the Rings and Braveheart will work very well also.

A truly epic way to spend an otherwise tragic and grim fortnight.