Blog 138: Aide Man-oire

I've got a friend who studied geography at University, and he told me that as part of his course, he had to keep a 'gender diary'. I laughed because it sounded exactly what it turned out to be. A hilarious activity forcing you to judge all your actions and force them into categories of 'male' or 'female' activities. He told me that I couldn't laugh at him because I'd never tried it. So he bought me a diary and made me start keeping my very own gender diary.

As I said, this activity forces you to be, well, a sexist, basically. So before you read on and go "Oh what brutish and old fashioned attitudes" please remember that I'm always only ever being facetious.

Here's the first few entries, and I'm sure there'll be more to follow.
Oh I should add, my friend has marked some of the entries on their manliness. That's the red numbers at the end of each entry.

Monday 23rd
I have to write a gender diary. Diaries are pretty girly so I'm already losing not losing...that suggests that being a girl is losing. Anyway, it's emasculating. But I've just been to the loo and can confirm I have the man "set" so there's some points in my favour there.
2

Panicked a bit at lunch, someone said both toilets downstairs were ladies. That would be bad for my masculinity, as well as possibly lead to arrests. But then I remembered there's a urinal in there so I'm ok. I did sit down to have my wee though.
-4

Tuesday 24th
I watched 300 last night. If marvelling at the conquests of bold King Leonidas isn't manly then I don't know what is. It also gives me something to aspire to.

King Me-onidas

Wow. Just wow.

2

I wish I could say I ate a burger for lunch, but I didn't. I had salmon and cream cheese, and french fries. They only have 80 calories.
-2

Wednesday 25th
Didn't do anything particularly manly or womanly today. I did eat some chocolate cake...which is ok I guess but not exactly a steak. Or beer.
0

Thursday 26th
I can't really remember what I did on thursday. I read the whole of Romans, for work. That's pretty epic, I guess. If King Leonidas read the bible (I'm guessing he didn't) he'd probably read the hard books all in one go too. It's probably the reason I can't remember anything else, it left my brain a bit sore.
-1

Friday 27th
Had to clean up after youth group but my normal co-worker was elsewhere and so I asked a parent to help lead. They had to take kids home so cleaning and locking up was just by me. I felt like a single mum...so it's kinda girly but it's also pretty strong, so a bit confused.
0

Saturday 28th
Major step in the wrong direction. Bought loads of organising stuff for my course. Then spent my DAY OFF organising and making it all look pretty. I even had a highlighter out at one point. I don't know what came over me.

I also bought a pencil case that looks like a shoe. I used to just carry a biro in my pocket. I've changed, for the worse.
-6

Just finished decorating all the stuff for my course. It DOES look fabulous.
-2

Sunday 29th
Just spent the evening recommending friends films. I suggested the Amazing Spider-man, 500 Days of Summer, the Mexican & Mean Girls. Not once did I mention Goodfellas, or Die Hard. I sicken myself.
-2

Monday 30th
Learnt some words in greek.
διότι ούτος νυξ, εμείς φάω σε κόλαση!
(Translation: Because this night, we eat in hell!)
This is one step closer to King Me-onidas level. He was spartan, and so probably spoke like this (but with a Scottish accent).
3

My total so-far: -10