Dear
Henry Cavill:
Hello
Mr Cavill! My name is Mike Pasquale, and I’m just a person really.
I’m
writing mainly to thank you. I’ve had a hairy chest for some time now, and
it’s been ever so difficult going through life with it. A lot of fashion
nowadays relies on men being very skinny, with little or no facial hair and
certainly no more than a ‘treasure trail’ in terms of torso hair. The ordeal
I’ve had to go through, endlessly buying t-shirts designed for very tall and
scrawnier chaps, and the sheer social pressure to wax my lovely tummy-forest;
it’s been very challenging.
I
always knew that given time, the chance for more hirsute gentlemen to have
their moment would come. The generation of girls who fancied Sean Connery has
long ago grown up and got married, and I’ve grown up in the era of girls who
instead chase Robert Pattinson and other similar people. Don’t get me wrong,
they are very good looking fellas, but it makes it very hard for people like
myself to join in with the fashion when I’d have to wax, and frankly, I don’t
want to.
And
so I want to thank you, as I believe you may be the figurehead of a new era
which will end in a better world, where men with dense forests emblazoned upon
their chest, like an S standing for Hope, will be held up as something for
others to strive towards. Now that Superman himself is a hairier gentleman,
how could anyone hold contempt for men like me, with our curls all over.
Well
done for Superman, I thought you did very well in the movie, and you came
across both very manly and also very super, which is ideal for that character
really.
Sincerely,
and thanks again!
Mike
Pasquale
P.S.
If you could do the next sequel and also be a bit overweight, not fat, just podgy, then that would also
help me out a lot. Although, I’ll understand if that’s a bit trickier.
He hasn't replied yet.
He hasn't replied yet.
Posts
No comments:
Post a Comment