Blog 132: Channeled Aggression

I wrote this a couple of weeks ago, and was pretty annoyed, so didn't publish it. It's never a good idea to publish something you've just written in a foul mood. So instead I waited until I was feeling a bit more cheerful and published it anyway...enjoy!

So I've had a bit of a manic week. I bought a new computer, and without 'slandering' the make (although if i was to say that it didn't work, it would just be truth) after spending over £1000 on a computer and finding it didn't work, and after spending every waking minute on the phone to my ISP, the place I bought it from, and the people who made it, let's just say when it's still just a glorified CD player (new computers don't even have CD drives so I can't even watch a DVD on the damn thing) I was feeling a little bit like everything in the world could and should me my own personal punching bag.

Let's just say my phone is better than my super duper top of the range computer at the moment. And I won't tell you what computer it is, but if you have ever read the story of the Garden of Eden, you'll know that this isn't the first time that this (or a similarly named) product has led to all hell breaking loose.

So imagine, I'm in a foul mood, I've packed up the computer ready to take it back, I've had several annoying phonecalls (all week, but loads this morning too) with cheeky sods who sarcastically ask if I'm Mrs Pasquale, and I finally have to accept that for the time being I'm going to have to sit and do work on my really out of date family computer, which basically doesn't work (although still works better than the new one...grrrr).

So I will begin by apologising to the people who write for this thing that plasters itself all over my facebook called 'Independent Voices'. I get that basically, we're the same. We both sit in front of computers, getting angry at anything, and then write sarcastic little articles about it all day and put it up for anyone to see. I mean, I don't force it down QUITE as many people's throats - people can read it if they want, but they're not teased in with catchy headlines. They also don't read it under the pretense that it is a newspaper article, just to find out it is some middle aged old bag who's just angry at Jeremy Clarkson BASICALLY because she's STILL single and her cats aren't giving her the satisfaction she so desires. So there are differences; subtle yes, but differences none the less. And let's not forget they probably didn't have their new computer delivered last week to be on their desk doing nothing more than being broken. But basically I get that this might be slightly hypocritical.

Basically though, I really don't care. I don't care if Ms (let's be honest, miss) I. ProbablyCan'tSayHerName hates Jeremy Clarkson. I don't care if he's on her tele and she'd rather watch Loose Women or some other dreadful 'hey look we can be funny even though we're middle aged and not funny!' show. But basically, just because Jeremy Clarkson said a car looks like a person with facial growths, doesn't mean I care, or want him off the tele.

The article is about Jeremy saying controversial stuff and how the BBC are too scared to stand up to him. But let's be honest, no they're not. They're loving it. Because he says something a bit iffy, and the internet lights up with talk of Jeremy Clarkson and the BBC and Top Gear and all of a sudden, Ms Won'tBeNamed isn't an independent voice but indirectly working for BBC's marketing division. That's why they don't stand up to him; because he inspires people with nothing better to do to write all sorts and advertise their shows for free. So shut up.

I'm not even gonna start on how that's hardly the worst thing said on television. It's not insulting anyone specifically and if you've got a facial growth and you're offended then sorry, but maybe don't watch Jeremy Clarkson - there are literally thousands of channels to watch. Just don't watch him. Seriously don't. I can't understand how people can get this fed up over one man saying something potentially offensive when there's so much going on in the world that's a trazillion times worse. And don't point out that I didn't have to read her article, I clicked something ages ago that means the independent fires stuff at me on facebook and also in the top right corner of my browser window and have absolutely no idea how to turn them off.

I feel bad cos I've gone mental at poor Ms. Unnamed but it's not just her. There's tonnes of these Independent voices, who think everyone wants to know what they're saying and everyone should listen to them because they're somehow enlightened because they write for the independent website (even though it's only the comments section). There are some that write there and they think they're funny, and they're the worst. To her credit, at least Ms. CantBeNamed didn't try and be funny. I've read several others who find themselves hilarious and write under the guise of irony or sarcasm but clearly don't understand what they are and they are just annoying.

Man, I was annoyed that day. Good news is the computer's working all nice.